Confessions Of Fat Femme Fashionista Stiletto Siren

The foundation of any outfit for most of us, well atleast those of us who don’t go commando, is underwear. A good pair of panties and a well fitting bra are the starting point to any good fatshionable outfit and they way we shop for these important items can make or break us. I highly reccommend putting aside some money for new panties atleast once every quarter (3 months) if thats not possible atleast try to change out your undergarmet wardrobe atleast twice a year. Now i’m not talking about lingerie or your fiesty sexy time attire, but your everyday panties and bras need to be updated, replaced and replenished(wheather the dryer ate them or you left them at the home of a one night stand i’m sure your missinga few pairs)  atleast a couple times a year.

First things first, lets talk about bras. As a plus sized woman bras are even more important for us then for others. Many of us are carting some pretty good sized breasts and support is key.  A supportive bra that fits us correctly is necessary. If your bra isnt cutting it, or is cutting in, it is likely you need to stop living in size denial. Just like it can hinder you to be in size denial in your outfits, when it comes to bras, squeezing into your high school or college bra size when you have certainly surpassed it isnt healthy for you mentally or physically.

When I was in high school I was a good 70lbs lighter then i am now and was wearing a 36C bra size. I was on the very end of still being able to purchase bras in non plus stores like Victoria’s Secret and Fredricks Of Hollywood and considered myself lucky to still be shopping there. I had always loved my breasts, used cleavage as part of my personal style, and enjoyed the way those bras made them look. When I started dating Nightrider a few years back she, who like the good ol’ dyke she is hardly ever wears a bra and when she does its of the sport variety, commented that I needed to invest in a couple new bras that fit me correctly. I scoffed at her and argued that my still 36C bra’s fit just fine and gave me great cleavage. She then pointed out to me the indents the bras in question had made all over my breasts into my rib cage and the horrible red lines  that appeared every time i took them off. She also pointed out that the second i got home I was taking off said bras and letting out a huge breath indicating that I probably had been holding my breath for the most part all day. I thought back on it knowing she was right but muttered something about beauty being pain and ended the discussion. It wasn’t until about a year later that I knew it was time to give in and get resized. Nightrider and I were eating dinner at our local Olive Garden one night and I was wearing a great bright red Fredrick’s Extreme Clevage bra and panty set. We had been waiting for a table for about an hour when we finally were seated and got our drinks and salads. Suddenly I got very pale in the face and started hyperventalating at the table. Knowing something was surely wrong Nightrider told me to go out to the car and breathe slowly while she got our orders boxed up and took care of the tab. I went out to the car and began crying and hyperventalting even worse….I was having a panic attack. Nightrider joined me in the car  and helped me to focus and slow my breathing down, I told her i couldn’t breathe and that my chest was hurting and I didn’t know what had set me off. She then to reached her arm down the back of my dress and unhooked my bra, almost instantly I felt better.  It was time to give in and get fitted for a new, correctly sized bra.

The next day we went to Torrid and Lane Bryant and checked out the bras, ylooked rather large to me and even though I bought all my other clothes in plus sized stores I was still struggling with my breast size denial. Finally the girls at Lane Bryant measured me and reported that I was measuring a 44DD.  HOLY SHIT! I freaked out, there was no way I had been wearing that incorrect of a bra size for such a long time. I tried on some bras in that size and while the 44 was fitting the DD was swallowing the girls. I eventually ended up fitting perfectly into a 44C and left with new and actually really cute and supportive bras and a new breathing capability I never knew I had. I highly reccommend going in and getting measured and seeing for youself if you have been wearing the wrong size and feeling the difference of a bra that fits correctly. It will change you life!

Something that I hear fat women complain about alot is that we don’t have as many cute options when it comes to bras, especially for the cute bra and panty sets that we see our skinny counterparts sporting.  I agree that this is true for the most part while there are some great options at some of my favorite plus sized stores there isnt really alot of sets out there . However  that doesnt mean you cant make what is available work. If you shop in the right places, in the right sizes you can find something that is cute and sassy that fits and then find a panty that will go with it rather nicely. Something I do is stick to solid colors with a bit of lace. Take a black bra with black lace and pair it with a black lacy boyshort and you got sexy! Same could really work with any color or style of lacy panty. I prefer boyshorts since they come up a bit higher and control the muffin top without being a granny panty and  I enjoy the way they leave a bit of the booty hanging out.  I find them flattering and comfortable and that is whats important. If you are a bikini girl, or hell even a thong wearer its your choice just make sure again you are buying the correct size from stores that specialize in fitting larger bodies and you will be set.

How can you expect to feel good and happily fatshionable if you are not wearing the right sizes? I can’t stress this enough being comfortable in clothes that fit and knowing where to buy them is one of the most important steps too becoming happily fatshionable.

Where are those stores and how do you get comfortable shopping as a plus size woman? That will be the topic next week so stay tuned for more of the Project Happily Fatshionable Series!